I've been in a hiatus for a quite...quite...quite... a long time.

Not gonna lie.

So, you might be asking, 'What this lady person even do to be not blogging?'

The answer is simple; I went outside.

I literally went outside, socializing, catching up with my friends, getting busy.
(Lmao I'm EXAGGERATING)

I didn't read (Okay I read some), I barely draw, I barely write.
Even when I'm 'prospering', socializing a lot... I kinda feel empty inside.

It scared me because it was to the point that I didn't know what to do when I was alone. 

To be really honest, I'm lost.

People did say, when you reach the age of nineteen and going twenty, you have this tendency to get lost, or easily get lost in your mind.

Just let's look what I did and happened to me for the passed 9 months or so;

1. I got a job



Which was nice since I did want to held a job before I reach 20.

The thing was: I had 2 months break and I didn't want to just stay at home, watching tv, sleep, you know; the usual stuff.
For the past semesters, my university was notorious for not giving any student a proper sem break so I'd been hustling for ages and taking full 2 months break sounded weird to me.

So I was thinking;
"Why not I try to find my first job?"

Which was *drum roll* in retails.
In a bookstore.

Amni? Worked in a bookstore? Irony and unsurprising right?

Also the fact that the bookstore was so near to my house and it was in a mall, with a cinema. Of course my geek ass would work there.

Working in retails thought me so much. You meet a lot of people with different backgrounds and goals and the stories on how they ended up working in the same place with you.

The only part I hate working in retails was the time and effort you gave doesn't reflect on your cheque. Also the constant family "We were in the mall just passing by the store so we decided to see you while you're working." visits.


2. My grades is getting better.



Okay this is a LIE. I hated my second sem.
Yet, I did better yet not in the better that I wanted it.

Y'all don't get how much stress I received on my first four months of 2017.
It was hell.

I was temperamental. Most of the things didn't go on the way I wanted. My grades suckkkssss (for that one particular subject), my assignment grades suckkkkkks, I started to lowkey hate French (because of that one particular subject), a lot of late calls on assignments, events we needed to do (and the fact we didn't have any experience of doing) shitty lecturer (that one particular subject, I see you).

But, it did get better, I'm striving this semester to fix my grades.

3. I joined club(s) at my uni.


It's kinda a big achievement to me cause I did have a big anxiety on me but it turned out okay? Which is somehow weird but okay?

I cannot meet new people. It still scares the living shit outta me.
But I felt a little bit safe because I had friends joining too.


4. I consciously, unconsciously put myself out there?



I joined events, I became facilitators on two the major events in uni, I met a lot of new people, I worked with a lot of new people.


5. My creativity gets recognition.



I don't know what I did, but Thank God I did it.
It feels nice to get your art, the things you've worked out of passion to be recognized.

So, I worked on a lot of non-profitable works.

And I have billion pictures of people in it and banner(s) at the back, it somehow looks like I'm sociable hahahahahaaohmyhahahaha